Chinese Traditional Values and Manners (2)

Modesty-

Children in China are taught about the importance of being modest as they are growing up and are frequently reminded of the Chinese saying by their parents and teachers. i.e. “complacency induces failure, while modesty generates progress and success.”

It is a virtue to be humble and low-profile, NOT to parade accomplishments in front of others, but leave it to others to speak good about you ( As the saying goes in China: “You are truly good only if others say so”).

Not to be complacent about the current achievements. When receiving compliments, instead of fully accepting,  in China it is proper to say, “You are overstating my achievements, I still have a lot to learn.”

Being modest in your language and your manners will be highly appreciated in China.

Chinese traditional values and manners (1)

One of the most important traditional values and manners in China is to be caring for the parents and the elderly.

Acts of caring for parents and the elderly in the household include: respecting them and their advice, visiting them often, providing financial support to them on a regular basis, taking good care of them when they are sick,  helping them with daily chores and serving them before serving yourself at the dinner table etc.

Actually to encourage the practice of this important traditional virtue, a law is implemented recently in China that parents can sue their child if the child doesn’t  visit them.

Chinese Greeting Manners

Handshake is a common way of greeting in China, with lowering the head a little bit to show respect during the handshake. Hugging is not commonly seen in China, esp among the elder generations.

It is a courtesy for the Chinese to present and receive business cards with both hands. After receiving the business card,  it is polite to spend a couple seconds reading it before you put it away. Don’t put the name card in your hip pocket. It is considered a disrespect to the card giver.

In the Chinese culture, people attach great importance to their title and ranking. It is considered respectful to address the Chinese with their position title, followed by their family name. eg. Manager Li (Li is the family name), Director Chan(Chan is the family name) instead of just calling them Mr./Ms. Li or Mr./Ms Chan.

Gift Giving Difference Between US and China

In US, when you are invited to a friend’s house for dinner, a bottle of wine, a desert, or a bunch of flower are popular gifts; When you are invited to a wedding, giving a gift card, or buying a gift from the registration list created by the couple is a common practice; When giving a gift, generally the gift receiver will open the gift in front of the guest during the occasion.

In China, when visiting a friend or relative, a basket of fruits or a bag of cookies, chocolates or candies are popular gifts; when attending a wedding, giving money in a red packet is a very common practice; Normally the gift receiver will not open the gift in front of the guests, but wait after the guests leave.

Restaurant Culture Difference Between China and US

In China, when a group go out to eat, generally the whole group will order and share the dishes together. All the dishes will be put in the middle of the table, and each individual will take a portion of whichever dish that they want from the middle of the table, and serve it onto their own bowl/plate; generally one portion at a time.

In US, when a group go out to eat together, generally each individual will order their own dish; And the dish is served individually, not put together to be shared.

In China, there is no tipping in the restaurant. All that you need to pay is whatever is shown on the bill.

In US, tipping is everywhere in the restaurant service. You tip the waiter or waitress based on how good their service is. Generally the tip is around 20% of your bill.

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